Just some things I'm really proud of...

This week I have been thinking about the things I'm proud of and I came to the conclusion that I don't just have one thing, so here's my round up of things I'm proud of...

In no particular order -

1. Proposing to Daniel my darling fiance and husband to be. And reaching our 5 year anniversary is another thing I'm proud of too! It's the longest relationship either of us have had and we have both grown a lot in the past 5 years. I'm really proud of what Dan has achieved with work, travel (for work and with me) and just being together.

The ring is engraved and says "Will you marry me?"

He said Yes!

Here we are with our flatmate Loren - photographed by Gareth from Duo Photography -

2. Making a future for myself and sticking with study, even through the tough times, illness and failures. Everything has helped build me up to be the woman I am today. 

In under six months I'll be all done with study and exams... And in less than a year I'll be walking across the stage at Graduation!

3. My nails - just having long nails and going to see my nail lady Serenity every month - has filled me with pride. I used to be a chronic nail biter from anxiety.  

 

4. Furthering my skills through online courses and courses from the university - just creating a better future for myself. To be doing what I love and learning lots every chance I get is amazing.
Recently I completed a few courses over the break from uni with Shaw Academy for Blogging and Content Marketing; learning how to be a Celebrity Fashion Stylist and Event Planning courses through Skill Success.
These cheaply found courses online have helped me to develop skills I didn't know I had to make me a more employable person. I've decided that Fashion Styling isn't for me, but the skills I've gained in learning how to tape shoes and such skills I've learned from these courses may be beneficial in future.

5. Working through my Anxiety and Depression and finding an awesome counsellor and doctor who helped me work through and learn techniques to help me control my panic attacks and keep calmer in exams. I must be doing a great job of it because I sat two exams recently without fear and without having any panicky feelings. So I'm really proud of myself for pushing through the tough times and persevering! I'm also really thankful and grateful for Daniel sticking by me throughout all these times, the good and the bad.

6. Having friends, family and flatmates who are there for me when I need them, and when they need me. They know who they are.

Until next week,
xo, Lisa.

Learning and Educational opportunities.

This year is my final year at university and as I get ever closer to graduation and my final two papers being done. I realise that Education, and learning for that matter, is an every day occurrence both in and out of the classroom.

For me learning is about gaining knowledge and is a skill that many possess but not many actually take advantage of. For me I am always on the lookout for skills and try and learn new skills through courses and online classes. I enjoy being in the classroom but I also enjoy working through things at my own pace.

I have been taking some online classes recently in Event Planning, learning skills to be a Fashion Stylist, and furthering my skills as a Blogger, Photographer and individual.
I hope to be able to apply the skills learned to my life now and in the future as an educator and teacher for ESOL students. I find vouchers online from sites such as GrabOne for educational opportunities which I take on. I've also done a 140 hour ESL teaching certificate through them too.

One of the difficulties I face is in organisation of actually getting work done when I work from home. Because I often find other jobs to complete before I allow myself to really get into study and get the course work done. When I'm on campus and working in a lecture theatre I'm more organised because I can attend at the lecture and tutorial times which are pre-set by the university. When I'm working from home I have to really work to schedule these work and study times or I can easily stay distracted all day or just not work on the things I'm meant to be doing.

Today for example instead of studying for my online courses I vacuumed the house and made dinner and extra food. I tidied up. I did a bunch of cleaning that needed to be done.

And I didn't get my work done for study.

Sometimes I have to remind myself that some days just getting out of bed and breathing is a big achievement for the day.

I hope to report back with the good news of completing assignments for my courses and that I've been awarded the certificates soon...

Until next week,
xo, Lisa.

Our Bedroom a super quick Room Tour in Photos

Photo special this week - Our bedroom... and how I have changed up the decor since we moved in. 

December 2015 to now - 

When we had just moved in.

 I don't know why the wall looks like it's two tones - in person it is all the same white. 

Bedside table - only on my side of the bed ... 

it has changed decor a lot over time from tissues and a power box to candles, Sheepy, flowers, a Heart print from Princess and the Pen, and a Heart lamp (from Typo), and much, much more.

Polaroids, and a novel...

The Polaroids then got changed up to be strung along a light set. 

My dressing table too has changed over time too.

This candle is so right - All you need is Love.

Until next week, 

xo, Lisa.

A check in and some new things in the works!

Back on January 4th 2016 I wrote this post and highlighted these goals - 

1. To finish my final 5 papers for my final year of study at VUW. I'm enrolled in a paper for summer which starts tomorrow - I'm excited and nervous to get these final 5 papers done. - I don't know what 2017 will bring - uni will be done and I'll be working!?

2. To lose weight, and this isn't a generic "I'll lose weight because it's New Years" thing, I'm serious.

3. To actually push myself creatively - writing blog posts, photographing for my Instagram, making YouTube videos? Actually doing things regularly to get my creative juices flowing.

And the usual New Years Goals:

• have fun, 
• keep growing my nails out, (2015 and prior every year it was hard to stop biting nails, counseling helped on this one!)
• exploring more of the city,
• learning new skills,
• and learning new things.

Well, now for an update - 

1. I've just done both the exams for my first two papers and I'm waiting patiently on the results from those and my course overall.
Oh! And I talked to my course advisor who has said I only need to do 4 papers this year, so the compulsory English 201 paper, then one from English 300-399, one from English 300-329 and another Religion paper... and then I can have a double major for my BA in English Literature and Religious Studies!
And in my exams, yes there were two! I didn't have any anxiety problems, no panic attacks or fear during the exam. I kept calm and got it done. (Go me!)

2. I haven't been doing much actively towards this goal, because of having a possible Morton's Neuroma in my toes diagnosed. I'll write a longer blog post about that later.

3. I've currently got 3 weeks off between exams ending and term 2 starting, so I've signed up to THREE online courses and I hope to upskill myself by doing those. They are in -
- Fashion stylist
-Blogging
-Event Planner

My nails still look awesome, although no photo as the polish needs replacing, my appointment is in a week, so I'll do a post about them later too.

I haven't been exploring more of the city recently at all. I really should do it more.

As for learning - see above with the online courses.

I feel like this post is more of an update kind of one, but that's okay. Sometimes we just need to check in and see how things are going.

Until next week,
XO, Lisa.

Update for the year and the future is coming

It is insane how fast this year has flown by, it's already the middle of May and that means that I have only mere months before I'm all done with study.

Come mid November after my final two exams are done, I'm a free woman - from university life at least - entering the big wide world of full time employment. I have a few ideas up my sleeve from working for myself as an ESOL Teacher, to finding full time work in a local tutoring service or school... or heading out overseas into the ESOL role I was offered in South Korea. There's plenty of options and I'm sure more will come knocking this year.

In the meantime I have to keep studying and reading - two more novels this week, and two essays by the end of the month... before two exams in June. I really hope I have managed to learn some relaxation techniques for my exam anxiety. I just want to pass the two classes and be done with school.

Then the excitement and madness of the Engagement Party in July with our families back in New Plymouth...            Before it all starts again for the second term of uni study!

(A dated selfie at Te Papa).

Daniel just celebrated making 5 years at his job at CricHQ which is quite impressive. He started at CricHQ when we hadn't started dating yet. I've certainly never worked that amount of time in one job!

I am also considering blogging more often in 2017, like a few times each week instead of just one post per week, but Daniel suggested I find a bit more of a niche market to write to, write about and share things from. Truth be told I don't really know what my overall theme or topic is, because I just write about my life - maybe I'm a lifestyle blogger? I do like a variety of themes though - I decided against cooking as an overall topic just because I find it hard to write a lot about cooking and baking... so while I enjoy doing it I won't be writing about it... I also like interior design type things but I also like to read about what others are doing in that realm!
It's hard to nail down to one or two topics.

If anyone has help or advice about how to nail down a blog topic - I'd love to hear it.
You can contact me on facebook - here, or on twitter here or leave me a comment below!

Until next Monday,
xo Lisa.

Life, foot problems and University

This week's blog isn't as happy as normal and that's because I'm trying to view the world through rose tinted glasses after receiving some bad news last week from my doctor. As always I'm trying to see the positives and thinking this is just a test on my patience and I'm learning that while I may be down with the pain, I'm definitely not out - and it doesn't help my study so much... Got to do what I have to do though to get through.

I'd been having foot pain for about a week and I'd been complaining about it a whole bunch when Dan suggested I see my doctor and get it checked out. So I did.

There's a high likelihood I have something called a Morton's Neuroma it's a benign (non-cancerous) growth in the nerve of the toe. In my case it's in my second and third toes on my right foot.

Now I'm on a bunch of pain meds and I've been having a hard time remembering to take them every 4-6 hours because as long as I'm busy with my essay and sitting still I don't feel the pain in my foot.
More to the point it's toe pain near the ball of my foot; it feels like I have a small stone or pebble in my shoe, even in bare feet! So yeah. It's not fun.

I have my toes buddy taped together in the hopes of preventing the V sign from getting worse. It's where the nerve is pushing my toes apart so they get more of a split between them. Normally toes sit nicely side by side, mine however have decided they really don't want to be friends any more and have split into a V shape.

Today I have to call and make an appointment for an ultrasound to be done to determine (if they can spot it on the scan) if it is a Morton's Neuroma. There's also a chance it won't be seen on the screen. Sometimes, especially if they're smaller, they can't get spotted easily. Obviously I'm hoping it is big enough to be seen.

The pain may have been happening for only 10 days or so at this stage, but it's enough for me to realise just how much we use our feet and rely on things not to hurt!

Daniel was really lovely and took me shoe shopping on Saturday so I have a second pair of sneakers to wear. All of last week I had to wear my bright (neon) coral sneakers as I couldn't wear my flat black cheap (chuck taylor type) kicks.

I've also worn leggings nearly every day too as it's easier than dresses when paired with sneakers. I also have been clever and just go to uni for as long as my lectures are on, then back home on the bus, and then back up again for tutorials. I try and keep walking to a minimum to help minimise the pain. Really, really bad for my fitness levels and I think I'm getting fatter, but I have to do what I have to... Otherwise the foot pain is too severe and I can definitely feel when I've walked far the next day!

If anyone has any advice about Morton's Neuroma pain and recovery... I'd appreciate the feedback. From what I've read online the past few days - the end result will be surgery after some time. However initially it looks like shoe inserts, taping the foot and toes ... and other such measures will be used first.

If you can give me advice on how to fashion sneakers better - I'd love some help and advice.
So far I've been wearing leggings, with a long top and something like a coat or long jersey over top with sneakers on my feet.

University and College Life Simplified

Back when I was a young first year starting at Victoria University for the first time I had been flatting for about 18 months prior to changing locale and moving to the big smoke of Wellington City. There I met Neil (a great friend even today, 7.5 years on).

Yes, 7.5 years ago I moved to Wellington. Today's post is focused on what I've learned during my time studying and will focus on campus life.
As a side note, I never stayed in a dorm/ hall so I have no idea what they are like.

My top 10 things to know about moving and living the university/college life.

1. You'll meet heaps of new people. Don't worry about making too many friends. I aim to have one or two people in each class I meet through the Tutorials we have to attend. This way I have one or two people I can sit by in the lectures and in the tutorials and actually get to know.
There may be literally hundreds of people in your lectures in first year, so it's crazy to think you'll know all their names at the end of the 12 week course. (Even your professors and tutors don't know everyone's names in that time period!)

2. Think about what you're taking with you to move, now halve it.
You really only need a few things while you're studying: 

a. A place to sleep (aka a bed). I had a mattress on the floor of my flat and did fine. Stack two on top of each other, or seriously invest in a bed base, your spine will thank you for it.

b. a Desk or Table to study at. I honestly used the dining table in one flat.

c. Flatmates or roommates to share the costs. It is very expensive to live alone. Get friends in to help financially. More people generally means the costs will be cheaper, but see what you can handle. I've lived with just the 1 flatmate and in larger places with up to 5 others. My fiance lived in a large house with 9 people in it! (That was too large, too loud and way too dysfunctional for me).

d. A little money and the ability to Budget - Budget really well... 
First take out how much your rent is.
Then your estimated bills (power, internet and cell phone all have monthly charges. Work these out and save up for when the bills come in).
Then anything else: food.
Then save the rest for a Rainy Day Fund,
Then some (if there's any left) for partying, drinking and anything you want for entertainment.

I decided that paying rent, bills and food were my three most important things. Some months I had very little food money left so I would talk to my Student Advisors on campus and pick up a Food Bank Parcel for that month. I didn't go to a movie at the cinema for over two years at one stage, just because I was saving and living pay-check to pay-check. Not ideal. So on that note: Always, Always have a "rainy day fund" stashed away, and for this I do not mean Movie or Coffee or Date Night, I mean for the times you're so sick you need to see a doctor*.

3.  Changes with friendships:
Your old friends from school may leave your life as you move into campus and study mode, and that's okay. Their lives are changing too. They may also be really special and stay around even if you're in separate places and living different lives.

4. You'll grow up.
You'll learn a lot of new things in classes.
You'll also learn to be a functioning adult able to budget and pay bills.
Look at you being all adult and adulting all over the place!

5. You might fall in love. 
Life will be sunshine and rainbows and 24/7 happiness.
It may be a long lasting romance, or a summertime fling.

6. And out of love. 
Or lose someone you were close to.
You soon realise that life is not always sunshine and happiness.

7. You may find a job you're only doing for the pay, or to get to know that cute person better, or to learn new skills. You'll probably have fun there and no adult job after you finish studying will quite be the same. You'll also appreciate how much your family did for you to help get you to where you are now.

8. At the end of your degree you'll look back and wonder what all the fuss was about when you first started. 
Everyone's scared of doing new things.
Everyone's afraid of failure.
You're also not everyone, because you're here and giving it a go, no matter how scared you feel.
Life has up's and down's, and part of college life is learning to embrace them, and learning to accept changes. If you're having a bad time emotionally, please seek the advice of the counsellors available to students on campus*.

9. Everyone started in the same place - Your professors were once first years, nervous and timid on their first day too. Some of them even feel first day jitters even now years and years on. Treat everyone as equal to you. You never know if they will be your future boss, or you could be their future boss! Literally everyone started at the bottom and worked their way up through life to get to where they are today.

10. Encourage your fellow students, and citizens of the city you're in. 
The students at least are feeling the same things you are - homesickness, they're nervous about getting lost, they're scared they will fail the upcoming assignment/ test/ exam... they're scared they're not good enough to be here. Everyone gets these feelings. It's normal.
Over time it gets easier. In the second trimester/semester onwards life on campus got easier. I didn't feel lost, I could (kind of) get my way around campus, and people would ask *me* for directions on the street in town.

* Some campus' have FREE medical services for students. See if your campus offers this. 

Hopefully these 10 points have helped a little. I think this year I'm going to try and write more about self-help type topics as well as keeping up with my usual random ramblings each week. I also want to know what YOU think. I've created a quick survey HERE which shouldn't take too long. 
I'd love to hear your FEEDBACK! 

Until next time,
xx. Lisa.

Have you ever thought about where your clothing comes from?

Hello dearest reader,

Have you ever thought about where your clothing comes from?

I mean really where it comes from?
 I don't mean in reference to the labels, or the store you bought it from -

 but who actually designs and who actually makes these items of clothing?

Clothing from my wardrobe.

From a variety of brands and shops.

In my own wardrobe I have a wide variety of items, from different shops, different brands. 

Varying prices.  I don't know where the majority are actually made. I mean a label may have a name and a brand, or a shop name... but often the Country of Origin may not be accurate.

I am not about to uncover a great expose - but rather I'm hopeful those who read this will think a little more about what they buy, where they buy it from and who actually manufactures such items. Even if we do not think about child labour in these sweatshops, but even consider the adults who work in these factories with low pay. We have to ask what will we as consumers do to help the people who create our clothing items? What will we do to ensure their work conditions are safer. Safer to work in without fear of death or serious injury.

I am going to highlight some particular cases and media reports - some of these are horrific, so I do advise discretion when reading, viewing and talking about them.

Wiki explains that "Sweatshop (or sweat factory) is a pejorative term

 for a workplace that has harsh/poor (socially unacceptable) working conditions. 

The work may be difficult, dangerous or underpaid. 

Workers in sweatshops may work long hours with low pay, 

regardless of laws mandating overtime pay or a minimum wage; 

child labor laws may also be violated."

Clothing from my wardrobe.
From a variety of brands and shops.

Last year on June 15, TV3 in New Zealand showed a TV show called "Reality Trip" it was a group of teenage fashion designers who have their minds blown when they find out who actually works in the factories creating these designer labels. Some of these sweatshops also manufacture items for everyday clothing stores which every day Kiwi's wear (and others around the world).

Watch what happens when a fashion blogger visits a sweatshop (blog).

The TV show 'Last Week Tonight Show' has a funny take on sweatshops and the effect they have.

A New Zealand article blames sweatshops on the West's Fashion Industry - where people have a high turnover of clothing items.

2008 TV Documentary called Blood, Sweat and T Shirts.

Salon wrote a piece entitled "Sweatshops still make your clothes".

Treehugger put together a list of 'unethical clothing makers and asks if they could be in your closet.'

The Daily Mail has an article on Sweatshops and a reporter went undercover to seek the truth.

War on Want has another article; based in China.

A Norwegian show also sends local teenagers into sweatshops. I watched these documentary style shoots on YouTube and found it very enlightening.

$5 duvet cover, and another discounted duvet cover. 

Both from Briscoes NZ.

So how do we prevent this?

1. We enforce fair and safe working conditions for all workers. No matter if they're in India, or China or elsewhere.

2. We seek out prevention of, and removal of, child labour work forces.

3. We seek out those who use these sweatshops and we, as a collective, petition them to use fair work spaces for all their workers.

4. Research and seek out fair trade agreements between countries.
Fair Trade for workers rights, workers pay and worker safety in the work place.

It seems no matter what you do, you can't win - if you try and purchase the expensive labelled items, or the cheaper everyday clothing it's likely to be made in a sweatshop.

All well worth considering while shopping,

Until next Monday,
xx Lisa.

P.S. Next Monday's post has some new excitement - I turn the tables and ask you some questions (survey time!) 
AND I'm doing my first ever Q and A! Send me your questions to facebook, instagram - OR you can tweet me @listay1 with the hashtag #LisaTaylorAMA

January is half gone, what?

Hello dearest reader, first up where, oh where has 2016 gone? It feels like yesterday that the new year was just starting and already summer school is a third of the way done! (Closer to half nearly). 

I've completed two of the assignments already and I have three more to go, two of which are essays which I'm not looking forward to so much! That said the assignments so far haven't been too disastrous and I've kept on top of things getting them done on time and handed in quickly. 

We will see how that continues for this year. 

I met with the Wizard aka Kate from the department of Humanities at VUW and she's awesome and said I'm well on my way to seeing a May 2017 graduation. So that's my new aim is to complete these final five papers and get that sorted. I had been told previously that I needed to do a 100 level English Literature paper to make up the 2 points I had been missing; but Kate assured me that this isn't the case! So I can do the three English papers I need for the requirements and then can choose either another English paper of 20 points or I can switch to any 15 point paper. So far I think I'll stick with that English one but I'll reassess how I feel about this at the end of the first trimester, when I've done two of the three required papers.   

Something I love about studying over summer is that there's so few students around which means that there's more car parking available - if only I had a car! - and there's fewer people on campus. The lecture sizes are also smaller and that means more one on one tutor time, or lecturer time. The lecturers and tutors do feel more rushed though as they push a whopping twelve week course into a compact six week course. The downside to this is also that on days like today it is sunshiny and hot out and I'd much rather be at the beach but alas I'm in a classroom (or in my office at home doing homework assignments). I guess it's good though because I won't be getting into and out of study mode so much which means my brain is always switched into study mode and I'm not lazy about references and citations. 

I am nearing the end of all of my study though and I'm kind of facing that I want to just stop studying for a while mode. (Not good!) So hopefully the classes keep my attention long enough to finish everything and things will continue to be good this year. 

Now bring on studylink and funded study.

xx. Until next time, Lisa.

Social media

Lately I've been watching a lot of Youtube videos, as well as uploading many photos to Instagram. Anything to distract myself from doing my summer school assignments, oh yes!

I haven't been the best so far this year at being on top of everything I'm supposed to be doing. I'm already behind on blog posts, my YouTube channel and filming has stopped. Something had to give! I'm also super thankful that Daniel agreed to having a long engagement, there's no way I could be doing all of this and planning a wedding as well! (Ask me nearer to the end of 2016 how the wedding planning is going.... *giggle* It's on Pinterest so far and that's it!)

I think I'll also have a bit more of a break from BATs theatre and ushering too - I've just emailed and let them know, as I think my workload this summer has already gone crazy and I need to ensure everything I'm doing is to the best standard it can be, and that I can be on top of my game for school too!

I signed up for a Religion paper a number of months back as I have 5 papers left for my degree and I figured I would do this 300 level paper and I'd be 20 points (1 paper) closer to graduating. I call it a paper, but really it's a 20 point course. Each course (except for summer school) runs for 12 weeks and then most have an exam at the end. Summer school runs for 6 weeks and some have exams, but most just have an exam in class at the end.

Luckily for me mine has an in-class text thing at the end and not a full on exam, as I'll be finishing this paper and going into Summer Shakespeare mode! I'm the Front of House Manager and loving every moment of it thus far.

Later today I have another meeting with the Production Team (this crew is filled with super amazing and talented people and sometimes I feel like I'm way out of my depth, but they're all really lovely and amazing and helping me out so much.) I'm just super thankful to have such a talented and awesome bunch around me. I went into everything filled with energy and raring to go, and lately with the low iron and health problems I've been less than ideal, and really not on my game!

I'm sure I'll be fine and everything when it comes to show time!

In the meantime, lots and lots of study, lectures and tutorials with my favourite tutor Bruno S. (Oh gosh, I hope he doesn't come across my blog!) haha.

Anyway, back to it. Have something like 100 pages to read for Religion before today's 2:10pm lecture.

xx. Until next time,  Lisa.

2016 Goals and Aims

It's already 2016.
Where did 2015 go? Time sure does fly when you're busy!

For the first half of the year I will have a lot going on, from summer school which starts this week for an intense month of studying...  and then next month Summer Shakespeare shows for two weeks - full time working hard in the Front of House as the FOH Manager.

In March I begin my final half of the year for my final four papers.

For 2016 my goals are:

1. To finish my final 5 papers for my final year of study at VUW. I'm enrolled in a paper for summer which starts tomorrow - I'm excited and nervous to get these final 5 papers done. - I don't know what 2017 will bring - uni will be done and I'll be working!?

2. To lose weight, and this isn't a generic "I'll lose weight because it's New Years" thing, I'm serious.

3. To actually push myself creatively - writing blog posts, photographing for my Instagram, making YouTube videos? Actually doing things regularly to get my creative juices flowing.

And the usual New Years Goals:

• have fun, 
• keep growing my nails out, (2015 and prior every year it was hard to stop biting nails, counseling helped on this one!)
• exploring more of the city,
• learning new skills,
• and learning new things.

According to a bunch of articles, and in particular this online article from 2012, sharing your goals online makes you less likely to actually succeed in doing them.
Weird huh?
I thought if you share your aims and goals that it would mean more people could encourage you in your progress. Apparently this is the opposite effect as sharing means more people are there to push you more, and increasing pressure means you're more likely to fail. So weird!



Some notes:
Goal 2: I went to my doctor in early December 2015 and found that I'm 25kg overweight. My fitness levels are non-existent. I've become addicted to sugar and eating junk food. My BMI is in the 'overweight' category and is on the Obese end. To put it the other way if I gained an extra kg I would be in the Obese category. That freaks me out. This is the wake up call I needed to see that I'm not living a healthy lifestyle right now. I need to work on my fitness levels and get healthier in what I'm using to fuel my body, mind and soul.

Special Post: PSA Why can a man ask, but a woman is not allowed?

Getting hitched.
Popping the question.
Saying goodbye (forever) to singledom.

However you word it, when someone opens their heart to another person and asks them to be with them it's no small feat. No small question. No small act of love.
It's heart wrenching to do and even worse to hear that you're the "wrong gender to be popping the question to him".

Wait. 

What?!

Why does the tradition of a man asking a woman to be his wife exist?

Has this tradition changed in the modern love story?

For me I have always thought that asking for a woman's hand in marriage was a big deal. Something I dreamt of happening to me. But the negative for me is the asking her father for her hand in marriage. That part of the wedding tradition feels so outdated to me.

Women of the twenty-first century are no longer property for one man to trade to another. 

So for me the discussion with my father is a bit odd.

Sometimes I wonder if I'm being too strong about my thoughts and feelings about this.
I haven't talked to my parents (or his Mum for that matter) about my feelings about this part of the marriage tradition. I don't know if I have these feelings about handing over the bride as a possession to be outdated because of my lack of religious faith, or because of my feminism views (which to me is just my everyday life).

After a period of time, there have been more questions about getting engaged too. From friends, family and colleagues. They find out we have been dating for more than three years, and go "sooo, ah, any plans for marriage?" or "where's the ring?" Over time it was hard, we laughed it off or changed the subject. Sometimes we would reply like we do when people ask about child rearing: [laugh and say] "Nah, not for a long time, if ever!" or "Not in this lifetime."

But more recently,  after hitting the four years dating mark... I started to question what we are doing together. Where does he see us in the next two years? Where do I see us in the next two years? I've got a year of study at university to go, as well as about six months study for my ESOL teaching side of things. He's working fulltime and has been for ~ six months longer than we have been together. We have also both been offered potential roles overseas, with open dates for taking them on. It's exciting and another period in our lives of changing things.

Is it time to buy a ring?

Dan was asking recently why do women get two rings for marriage - one for the engagement and one for the marriage ceremony. Men only get one at the marriage ceremony. I don't know why we do engagement rings for women only. It seems sexist, right? Not allowing men to have the same opportunity as a woman?*

It all goes back to tradition apparently. Based on Jewelry stores who tried to continue diamond sales during the 1930's depression (among other times of financial drops of the past). . . As for the tradition of "three months salary for the engagement ring"... yeah, same thing, for jewelry sales.

In fact men's engagement rings have been around since the 1990's or so and increasing in popularity even more so in the past ten or so years. Many jewelers will now stock a range of engagement rings for men as well as the more traditional looking ones with diamonds and so on. 

I call the women's engagement rings more "bling", while the men's ones seem more plain. 

Same deal with wedding rings actually. Although the wedding bands seem to be more plain for both genders.

On the future.

I think it's time for us to buy some rings and ask the question - I see us having a longer relationship lasting into the future. Maybe both of us will ask. Maybe one of us will. 

At the end of the day I am not sure if there even is a one-size-fits-all solution to this dilemma.

* - Sarcasm.

*** Dan and I have been dating since July 2011. ***

Things on my mind... A ramble and a rumble

Blogging is super hard sometimes. I get writer’s block and don’t know what to write for days or even weeks on end. Some days though I get into such a writing groove that I end up sitting at the laptop for hours and hours on end. Typing away. Editing as I go. Sometimes not editing at all. Other times I post-edit after something has gone live on the blog. Sometimes I wonder if I have written something well. Sometimes things get seen by more people - it all depends how far I push the posts and where they are seen. Most of the time I post the links to the blog through Facebook. Although I am slowly but surely trying to expand into other areas of social media - Twitter, instagram and pinterest.

The blogging world is tough to get into though, especially if you want to go viral. It takes a lot of hard work to embrace your followers and keep them interested in your content over time. For me I look at other blogs and websites and see what things on them make me want to keep coming back. I have a few vloggers on YouTube who I watch whenever they post. I want to keep watching their videos because they embrace such positivity and love showing off their city and life in their videos. Every video has the same life things going on, but there’s always a funny twist that happens. Or a serious twist. At the moment Erik Conover who I watch (just look up his name on YouTube to find him) is going through some drama with noisy, obnoxious neighbours. Him and his girlfriend have talked to the building super and things are okay, but things with the neighbour have escalated even more during November 2015. Each day I try and leave positive comments on their videos to show how grateful I am to watch them every time.

I’m also prone to falling on my laptop’s keyboard and later having the courier knock on the door, along with bills from the bank (just kidding, I only spend the money I have saved up), with online purchases from the same select few websites - The Warehouse, ASOS and TradeMe (a New Zealand auction website, which is a bit like eBay I guess). Sadly, currently I am not working enough so I can’t go online and buy everything that I like the look of. I did manage to score a great little bargain a few days ago though, even in my lack of money state I found a new Glassons t-shirt on TradeMe, with tags on and everything. It was ten dollars including postage to my apartment. I then got it and looked at the tags and realised it had been labelled wrong, the label said size 16, but it fits more like a size 14. On the tags it said size 8. Strange. It also said it was forty dollars new, but I had managed to get it for only ten! Score! Best day ever.

Today I have been on TradeMe some more, but not to find any more clothing bargains, to find duvet sets and sheets for our bed. I realised we are using the same sheets and stuff from the past three years, no longer; Four years. Longer. Maybe even five or six years. Ick! I think we need to upgrade some of them, they are starting to get holes in them and starting to look badly faded. Good thing it is coming up to Christmas - lots of sales will happen, so we will be able to get some great in-store bargains from Briscoes, Farmers, or maybe from TradeMe or somewhere else? online. I also need to buy some other things too.

I guess that the Boxing Day sales (the day after Christmas Day) will be a great sales, and bargain hunting, time once more. Each year different companies seem to target different products or ranges within their stores, so it will be interesting to see where the best electronic gadgets will be, as well as clothing and so on.

The thing I like about shopping and bargain hunting though is that I can get inspired by things I see online and then recreate them in my own style and with my own twist on things. Nothing worse than being a clone of everyone else. Being original is all over my blog posts too, I write how I think and I write about things that annoy some of my family, and my friends. I am always having heated discussions with at least one person who has been offended by a view I have. It often makes me laugh when someone tells me my post is offensive, especially when they then can’t engage in a rational argument with me proving why I am so offensive in my posts! Haha. I mean sure, be offended but tell me what I said that was so wrong and how I can correct it in the future.

You can’t expect every single person you meet to agree with you twenty four seven, that’s unreasonable. Examples of such topics include childfreedom - not having or having children and my views on such decisions… Sexual health and reproduction - what do the doctor’s say? What’s the science? Why are there myths around periods and what’s the truth, biology wise?

I feel that having, or not having, a child or litter of children is a personal choice between the couple. There is no right or wrong time or age or circumstance to bring a child or children into the world. And if a childfree advocate person changes their mind the world should not respond with their minds being blown and snarkily responding to the couple. Things happen. Condoms fail as can other forms of contraception. Even the snip (Vasectomy for a man) and getting tubes tied or cut and burned (tubal ligation for a woman) can fail, sure the chance is about one per cent, but it can happen.

Pregnancy can also just miraculously happen for unknown reasons too - of course no matter the outcome of what caused the pregnancy in the first place - it is generally from two people of the opposite gender having unprotected sexual intercourse!

I have been vocal about being childfree and never, ever having children. More recently after another video interview that went worldwide I realised further that I am more childfree right now due to timing. I am having problems with my reproductive cycle - my periods are all over the place, I feel like I’m a girl going through puberty and just starting my menstrual cycle for the first time. In reality I am twenty seven years of age, and been menstruating since I was fourteen.

I have always been open on my blog about my health concerns and talking about contraception is a common theme of my blog. I do not see why people would hide their problems on the internet, who knows, maybe someone will identify with the health things I go through and either seek help, or will have advice for me and my doctor to try something that they found worked for them in the same situation. I cannot be the only woman in the world with a longer than twenty eight day cycle and problems with finding a contraceptive that works in that situation.

Back when I was fourteen I had a cycle that was either six or eight weeks long, which is ridiculous for finding out if you’re pregnant and tracking a cycle of that length is difficult! As a result my well meaning mother and doctor got me onto contraceptive pills. Which helped. For a while. Within months though, if not about a year, I was back to the doctor with what’s known as Breakthrough Bleeding symptoms, of periods that were two weeks apart, even though the Pill cycle was twenty-eight days long.

I was changed on to higher and higher dosages of the Pill, until finally at twenty five I changed my personal GP (General practitioner) who realised the high level of hormone I was taking was causing other problems with bleeding irregularities and headache problems, relating to high blood pressure. I have been lucky to not need blood pressure medication for that. It is something I have to keep an eye on though. As for the menstrual cycle? I have to go back and see what is going on, because the strange two weekly periods are back, kind of. I have had these strange fluttering feelings in my uterus more recently too. I do not know what it is and I worry about pregnancy and the effects that it may have on my studies and living in a flat with flatmates in the coming year. I have an appointment with my Family Planning doctor for the first week of December, so hopefully we can discuss what is happening and why and get to the root of the problem so I can go on without worrying that I need to carry sanitary products and feeling embarrassed for leakage.

Leakage freakage is definitely a thing guys!

Wanderlust, Anxiety and other things on my mind.

Today I have been thinking about my constant feelings of wanderlust it does not seem to matter if I have literally just walked off the plane from a prior trip, I am already dreaming of the next adventure. The next place to go. The next place to explore. Wander. Get lost in. Daniel and I have been fortunate to be able to go travel to some of the most beautiful places around New Zealand and Australia. In my life thus far my parents gave me the wanderlust bug. I can never get enough of going somewhere new and exploring my way around a new town or new city. I am currently living, studying and working in Wellington, New Zealand and it is amazing. Daniel and I have lived here together for the past three years. (I have lived in Wellington for six and a half years now, Daniel has been living here for about seven years.)

During our relationship we have travelled, at least once a year either back home the hour flight back to our families or over to Australia. We have stayed in Melbourne twice with his brother and in a hotel… as well as in the Gold Coast where we have friends who live. Both places are awesome to explore and pretend to be a local in. When I travel I like to live, act and feel, as much as possible, like a local. Visiting local markets, getting fresh food the same way the locals do. Exploring market places. I love markets. You can always find such amazing, one off pieces at markets. Whether they are clothing items, crafted items or food and beverage is another story! Some of my favourite markets include the Queen Victoria Markets of Melbourne, the beachfront markets of the Gold Coast (along Surfer’s Paradise), and the markets throughout Wellington city. The City and Sea Markets down by the waterfront are fun and colourful.

Part of my reasoning for being ‘like a local’ as much as possible is due to the fact that I tend to get annoyed that Tourists have a certain air about them. Of arrogance. Self righteousness. Of wanting things always, done now. I try and be more cool and calm about things. My room is not ready yet? I am happy to sit in the bar and have a drink while I wait. How long will it be? Oh, half an hour. Totally fine. When things go wrong, being nice is the biggest compliment to give. It is so easy to hit the anger switch and break down into tears… Much harder to be the better person who smiles and asks nicely when something will be done. As such I am more likely to find a hotel or accommodation spot which allows me to cook, or bring in any kinds of food I like. I am not big on sitting and eating in a restaurant when I am here in Wellington.

I am a bit socially awkward and find restaurant small talk difficult. I think it comes down to me liking written words more than spoken ones. Good thing I write on a blog each week! I am slightly paranoid in that I do not know who is listening to me, and I do not like the feeling that someone is overhearing me, even when it is an innocent everyday conversation. Strangely I do not have this feeling as much when I am actively teaching a student in the public library, go figure!?

The Gold Coast Australia Trip Part Two

So last week I shared some of things we got up to in the Gold Coast back in July, this week I've written more about our trip: Shopping, photographs and fun times. I also do a bit of a review of the places we went and what I recommend to do when you're in Surfer's Paradise and Chevron Island (Gold Coast).

Shopping?

Pacific Fair: 
Open Monday to Saturday 9am to 5:30pm, Sunday open 10am to 4pm.
To get there? Use the G:Link (it is the last stop) or one of the public transport buses (check this website for timetable and journey planner). Located on Hooker Boulevard.
Lots of shops here too ~ from food and beverage outlets in the food court,  Kmart, Myer and a wide variety of clothing and shoe shops, to Smiggle and a surprising amount of chemists!

Beach front Markets: Along the Esplanade by the waterfront.
Open Wednesday, Friday and Saturday between 4pm and 8pm, during summer the hours are longer, I think it closes at 10pm? Beachfront Markets site for information

Cavill Ave ~ One of the main streets through Surfer's Paradise. We found a variety of food and beverages along here. During Schoolies it's worth skipping the area though due to the crime rate increasing.

Paradise shopping centre: 
Open every day 9am to 10pm. Located on Cavill Ave.
Lots of shops in here from clothing, to food and beverages and even a Build a Bear workshop! (When we were there in July they had Minions stocked too).
Another highlight is this cute Photography place just outside ~ didn't get pictures this time, but definitely want to in the future.
Vodafone was my stop for my sim card for my phone. There's a number of mobile stockists all near each other so it's personal choice which to use. I just know Vodafone works with my phone so I went with them.
Dan and I also bought bags from Strandbags - he needed a carry on suitcase, and I needed (Okay wanted) a handbag. Both were on sale. (Score!)
You can find more of the shops and info here: Paradise Centre

Activities and things to do?

Infinity: 
***Warning: a few semi-spoilers:
Open daily 10am to 10pm. An optical illusions extreme journey, through 20 areas of insanity. In a couple of rooms I felt like I just needed to get out of *right now*, filled with an infinite space of mirrors ~ inside the computer themed room ~ (floor, ceiling and all four walls) as well as being a maze like space... combined with not being able to find the door and feeling unbalanced about it all wasn't a good feeling - I managed to stop the panic attack but yeah, it's crazy! It took another couple of hours to have my stomach settle after we had left. (Definitely not so fun for me).  It's well worth doing once, but it isn't something I will do again because of how I felt afterwards, Dan said he'd do it again though.

One room has a wobbly floor (there's an option to go around this one though if you're uncomfortable with uneven floors and the signs do warn you so you can take another path), as well as plenty of very trippy and extreme areas.
One area has a Fog Machine - so be aware you may need to walk through quickly like I did as it's hot and a little too humid and it started to effect my asthma. I wasn't so happy with the strobe light area too - felt dizzy after a short time, so be wary of the warnings and walk through areas quickly if you're feeling off about them. There's some good "scary dark" areas too, nothing is too freaky and even I was okay with it.

Tickets for adults are $26.90,  kids are $17.90, seniors are $19.90 and family passes (2 adults and 2 kids) are $72.90. Visit their Website for the exclusions and warnings: there's also a lot of strobe lights, and other light tricks, so avoid Infinity altogether if you're sensitive to flashing lights. 

Infinity is NOT disability friendly with stairs and dark spaces, you need to be in good health and fitness to go through. No photography and you can't take bags in, but they offer a "secure" space for bags to go behind their counter. You have to wear white sock things over your shoes and white goofy gloves that look like Mickey Mouse gloves.

There is also a photograph spot where they take a photo of you, which you can purchase if you choose. When we went through we accidently/on-purpose photo-bombed another groups one, which neither group ended up buying! hehe.

Q1 aka the Skypoint Observation Deck: Great views over the city and local beaches. Option to do a Sky Walk around the exterior of the building, we didn't do this, but we did see others do it above the viewing level we were on. There is a cafe for food and drink in the observation level too, although we didn't use it. There are no glass floors to walk on - I was a bit disappointed about this, but the building is not really set up for that kind of experience.
Tickets are $22/$29 for adults depending if you want one or two entries, kids entry (one day) is $13 and seniors (one day) is $18. Visit their Website for more information.

Wyndham Cruises: We went on the afternoon cruise, $29 per person (it was cheaper with a voucher through Experience Oz so we got it down to $19 per person (lots of cool things on the site for various tourist attractions for cheaper). We had a platter of food too, and complimentary water. There was also a bar where you could buy drinks as well as alcohol. Lots of the photos I've added to the end of this post were taken from this cruise.

Departs at 3pm and is back to the wharf around 4:30pm.
The crew is efficient and give a good tour with a funny commentary along the way.

There is two levels on the boat so you can be inside in the air conditioned cabin area, or up on the roof deck. We spent half the cruise in each area and if it's warm and sunny definitely head up to the roof deck level!

Pros: There is a LOT of photography opportunities as well as dreaming about the million dollar homes you pass. (70% of which are not lived in full time!) When we went through there were more than 5 sections, and around 6 homes for sale.
Cons: The food platters were plain, but the rest of the cruise made up for our initial disappointment with the food (crackers, and crusty bread with cheese, two kinds of spread and some nuts).

Australia Zoo - just an hour north of Brisbane. (Aka the home of Steve Irwin the Crocodile Hunter).
We visited Australia Zoo on a warm day.

Bindi's Island is quite cute - entry is through a pirate ship, and you can see snakes and a snapping turtle, in her new three storied tree house, which overlooks more of the zoo.

Wear good sneakers as the zoo is huge and you will do a LOT of walking. There is a train shuttle ride you can purchase too - we didn't. There is also wheelchair access and it's disability friendly, it is very accessible with wheelchairs and prams. The zoo is spread out over a large area so you'll be tired at the end of your day there!

Tickets for adults (15+) are $59 per person, kids (3-14) are $35, seniors and students $49 each. More information is on the Zoo website.

We did a transfer to get there from through Experience Oz which was $65 per person. We worked out that it was cheaper for us to just do the transfer to/from the zoo and our resort, and purchase the zoo tickets at the zoo.

One of our highlights was getting a photo with the Tortoise:

The zoo keeper assured us that if the gates were 'accidently left open' the Tortoises would take a good hour to hour and a half to actually notice the open gates and get to freedom! LOL.

They're such large, majestic creatures but man they move slowly.

Comparison to me at Melbourne Zoo about 2 years prior. I love Turtles and Tortoises...

Below: 

Photos from the Cruise; 

Waiting for the cruise to start on the jetty...

Dan with the complementary food.

On board, waiting to depart from the dock.

Dan on the top deck of the cruise boat.

Photography going off...

The dress with the lace inserts.

Chevron Island bridge between Chevron Island and Surfer's Paradise main shopping area.

Us at the Q1 Skydeck...

The hair ties I swear by:

These are so, so good and

they don't leave that annoying kink in the hair when you wear a pony tail all day... 

Glassons NZ also sell them (they're currently on sale, so may not be available for much longer).

Dan with our cocktail we had with lunch, fresh berries with lemonade and vodka. Yum!

Flowers on Chevron Island... 

****I was not paid to advertise any of the services in this post,  I am just writing my opinion/s on them.****